|bewarethesmirk (bewarethesmirk) wrote,|
@ 2010-05-18 15:05:00
|Current music:||maneater - nelly furtado|
FIC: Psychobabble Upon Your Lips (Hermione/Luna, PG-13)
femmefest has posted its masterlist. I participated and wrote a pinch-hit. I'll post my pinch-hit, An Orgasmic Quest, tomorrow. Below is my favorite of the two, Psychobabble Upon Your Lips (originally posted here), which is Hermione/Luna, an incredibly fun pairing to write. :) It ended up being given to a_shadow_there, which is great, because she is a fantastic writer and very awesome. :D
Thanks so much for the mods for making this such a great fest and to woldy and kerrychambliss for each betaing a fic for me. I received a fantastic Hermione/Pansy fic, (Not So) Righteous, from girlofavalon. Because of my pinch-hit I received a gift with a pairing I've never read but enjoyed all the same, Can't Wait for the Weekend by lily_pearl.
Title: Psychobabble Upon Your Lips
Pairing(s): Hermione/Luna, mentions of past Hermione/Ron
Summary: "Don't be embarrassed," Luna said, stepping into the office and closing the door behind her as if she'd been invited to stay for a cuppa. "You look pretty on your knees."
Word Count: ~2,300
Author's Notes: Thank you so, so much to kellychambliss for betaing on such short notice and doing an amazing job. Further, thanks so much to the mods for their patience. Title taken from La Roux's song 'Tigerlily.'
If Hermione needed anything else in life at that exact moment, it was something else to clean.
Her office was immaculate. She had dusted her desk – only after cleaning out all the drawers first and re-alphabetising the files, of course – and all of her deadlines were met. It was midday, and she had virtually nothing else to accomplish, and that clearly wouldn't do.
She had to do something to keep her mind off Ron sodding Weasley.
And that's how she came to be on her hands and knees cleaning dust bunnies from beneath her desk, arse in the air, when there was a light knock on the door. Most people actually waited for a response before entering but evidently not this one.
The door opened and Hermione scrambled to her knees. She turned her head, expecting her boss or – Merlin – the Minister of Magic.
It was, however, Luna Lovegood. That wasn't any better. It was worse.
"What can I do for you, Luna?" Hermione asked.
Luna tilted her head and looked down her nose at Hermione, as if she was in possession of all the dignity in the world, with her Muggle notepad and a pink writing contraption with a huge puffy ball feathering out at the end. "Why are you on your knees, Hermione?"
She would not blush. She absolutely wouldn't.
"I was cleaning."
"Don't be embarrassed," Luna said, stepping into the office and closing the door behind her as if she'd been invited to stay for a cuppa. "You look pretty on your knees."
Hermione climbed to her feet, cheeks flaming, and ignored Luna's outstretched hand. Trying to smooth her skirt and blouse into some semblance of order, she moved behind her miniscule desk and heaved a mountain of neatly-stacked files out of the way so that she could watch Luna leave. She opened her mouth to speak, but Luna got there first.
"Did you see them?"
Luna's eyes were blue-grey, wide and focussed unerringly upon Hermione's face. Her pink mouth was twisting into a little smile that Hermione did not like in the slightest.
"See what?" Hermione asked with a heavy sense of dread.
"The mugworts," Luna said slowly, as if Hermione was dense. "The Ministry has a huge infestation. You're the Assistant to the Head of the Protection of Minority Magical Creatures, after all."
One: Hermione had no idea what mugworts were and doubted they amounted to more than superstition or a fragment of Luna's imagination. Two: Who gave Luna the right to parade into Hermione's office and make directives?
"It is a matter of grave concern," Luna pressed on, turning away from Hermione and surveying her office as if expecting a swarm of mugworts to come descending upon them from the ethers. "You should go see someone about this immediately. I am happy to go with you. I wrote a piece about them for the Quibbler." Luna smiled. "You might have seen it."
"No, sorry," Hermione said and began to gather some files in hopes of communicating that she was very busy finding something to keep her busy.
"No matter, I'll owl you the article. You might find it useful and it's certainly worthy of more research. With the Ministry's support you might be able to acquire enough funding –"
Enough was enough.
"Luna," Hermione said, tucking a wayward strand of hair behind her ear.
"Yes?" Luna asked brightly.
"Is there something I can do for you?" Hermione asked, nodding toward Luna's notepad and monstrosity of a biro. "I really do have a lot of work and –"
"Is that why you were hiding under your desk?"
Hermione flushed. "I was cleaning."
Luna tilted her head again, squinting at her, and Hermione felt like some obscure magical creature Luna wanted to study. Hermione reddened further. "By hand?"
"I find it soothing," Hermione snapped, sitting up straighter in her chair. "I really have a lot to be getting on with, so…"
Luna walked serenely across the room and sunk down into the chair in front of Hermione. She beamed. "I wanted to get your opinion on the house-elf liberation meetings in Edinburgh. I'm doing a piece for it on the Quibbler, and you're the leading authority on house-elf justice within the Ministry."
"Oh," Hermione said. Well, this was far more interesting than decimating dust bunnies, she supposed, and that was all it took for her to capitulate. "I can speak to you for about an hour."
"That'll do." Luna smiled and this time it wasn't all that annoying.